FYI - YAFL

So I'm sitting at the bar and she shows up and clenches my arm telling me to never go and the other one yells that I have to tell her to fuck off or she'll never walk away.
-- Greg the Boyfriend

I better start hanging out at college bars, drinking peppermint schnapps, and lifting weights. I am going out tomorrow to buy a track suit. Then I am going to the nearest KFC to get myself a bucket of original crispy chicken. It has to be a bucket though, no boxes, a fucking bucket I tell you. I have always been attracted to the bucket of chicken, it is the ultimate fashion accessory of American decadence. It goes well with one story motels, large tv's displaying hard core porn at an alarmingly loud volume, and wood panelling. I'll carry it around, my very own bucket, wearing a track suit, walking and eating at the same time, grease all over my face. Up and down the avenue, I will stare people down as they look at me in disgust, while I throw chicken bones over my shoulder.

Not a care in the world.