It Feels Like

Yes we have dreams and we want them to come true
yes we will live for these moments, me and you
There's more to life than the every day routine
keep this in mind 'til life becomes your dream

-B. Fleischmann, Le Desir.

I just read the most scathing review of B. Fleischmann's Welcome Tourist, where the author raged about the inclusion of two vocal tracks at the end of the album. They are my favorite songs, and Le Desir, in particular, has provided me with plenty to think about. All week I have been up and down the trolley lines with my headphones on. I've seen the faces of the unhappy, smelled the stink of the homeless, and curled my toes at the sight of beauty. While The Fall has me tapping my foot and staring at the graffiti, Le Desir finds me looking out the window, and the avenues become a metaphor for my moment.

Last Saturday, I missed a huge party on the scummiest street in town, even with frantic calls from Nymphalidae relaying the amount of free drugs and booze to be had, I couldn't wrestle myself from Liza's, where we were singing songs and drinking Canadian Club. After I finished the bottle, I laid it on a piece of paper, traced its outline, then wrote a letter to Liza's roommate, Elema, inside the outline of the label. I placed it on her pillow so that she could read it when she got home. I won't tell you what it said, that's private, but I did have a moment of terror the morning after, lying in the bottom of the tub, when I recited it back in my head. I was quite smitten with myself though, when Elema messaged me after three days had passed to say that she got us tickets to the James Murphy show here in the home town. So it couldn't have been all that bad.

Our band has been recording again, and a lot of buzz has been circulating about just how good this album is sounding, but me, I am just happy to sit at the east side studio in the sun with Remington, Leroy, and Liza. There is the loveliest patio outside the studio and we will all hang out there, drinking espresso, and playing each other songs. It was in one of these moments that we came up with the idea of performing as a different band, one night only, in which I would sing most of the songs and play guitar. So in a weeks time I will be singing and playing guitar in front of an audience, rather than playing to the emptiness of my living room. My how times have changed.

So, this is how I see it, as it's late and I want to wrap this up. I am on fire.